Life lessons

Learn everything you can before going off half cocked!

A Cowboy sitting in a saloon one Saturday night, he recognized an elderly
Man standing at the bar who, in his day, had the reputation of being the
Fastest gun in the West.

The young cowboy took a place next to the old-timer, bought him a drink and
told him the story of his great ambition.

"Do you think you could give me some tips?" he asked.

The old man looked him up and down and said, "Well, for one thing, you're
Wearing your gun too high. Tie the holster a little lower down on your
Leg."

"Will that make me a better gunfighter?" asked the young man.

"Sure will," replied the old-timer.

The young man did as he was told, stood up, whipped out his 44 and shot the
bow tie off the piano player.

"That's terrific!" said the hot shot. "Got any more tips for me?"

"Yep," said the old man. "Cut a notch out of your holster where the Hammer
hits it. That'll give you a smoother draw".

"Will that make me a better gunfighter?" asked the younger man.

"You bet it will," said the old-timer.

The young man took out his knife, cut the notch, stood up, drew his gun In
a blur, and then shot a cufflink off the piano player.

"Wow!" exclaimed the cowboy " I'm "learnin' somethin' " here. Got any More
tips?"

The old man pointed to a large can in a corner of the saloon.

"See that axle grease over there? Coat your gun with it."
The young man went over to the can and smeared some of the grease on the
Barrel of his gun.

"No," said the old-timer, "I mean smear it all over the gun, handle and
all."

"Will that make me a better gunfighter?" asked the young man.

"No," said the old-timer, "but when Wesley Harding gets done playing the piano,
he's going to shove that gun up your ass, and it won't hurt as much."