So I got a call

 Actually it was a text from the wife telling me she ran over a mattress and it was wrapped around her wheel.

"A what?"
*A mattress I ran over and it's wrapped around my wheel*

"Send me a pic, which side?"
*Passenger side- wait, DPS just showed up..."

-I get a call that Roadside help (state funded) is on the way, but I'll need to come up and see what I can do, or get it towed back-

"Where are you?"
*At mile marker 449*
"On 35?"
*No, 130 toll road*
"You took that toll road to Phlugerville😦?"
*I was following Siri....*
"Let me grab some cutting utensils and I'll be on the way."

~Later~
Call
*Okay, the roadside guy took the tire off and the metal is wrapped all around the axle and he can't really do anything*
"I'm on my way, about an hour/45 minutes from you now."

~~I get there and see basically...this~

So I get the sawzall, which isn't doing shit because I loaned it to someone and I think he used it for a hammer because you have to hold the battery in with one hand while trying to cut .... springs... with the other.

I went to the cutoff wheel on the grinder and made some progress- until I couldn't go any more because of  the freed springs.
So here I go with the Lineman's pliers for a good 45 minutes just to clear up enough to go to work with the grinder again.

Oh........ did I mention we were on a bridge?
The cement shook and the truck wobbled whenever a steering wheel holder in a semi in the granny lane went past.

So I get enough  cut that it would clear the brake line and hooked a strap to whatever I could reach that looked like it wouldn't just unravel- and put the lose tire under the cab step because I was positive that I'd pull the truck off the jack.

The second time I reattached it, down the truck went, but we kept pulling.

Third time - JACKPOT!

So nothing got accomplished yesterday at all.

Who said Brandon was too senile to read a TelePrompter

 I wish I knew how to embed this:

https://www.tiktok.com/@therealcoachjosiah/video/7130652840309165354

Your Rule 5 Monday puzzle

 Sailor Jerry

 

As usual, the big on below the fold.

Black and white jigsaw puzzles

 Are a lot harder than colored ones.

Take this example-

Move it to here and give it a try,
It took almost half an hour to do 130 pieces.

Your Rule 5 Monday puzzle

 The predators stare.

The big one below the fold.

Bummer

Not that I really give a shit about the Tour De France.
It's just fun to see these assholes crash and burn.

I got a month suspension on FB  for mentioning that the Twenty Second German Panzer Corps won the first Tour De France in 1940....

I'd trust him

 I saw this in Austin yesterday.
I guess it's one of Brandon's industrious guests that do things Americans won't....
Or sumpin'
It's supposed to say car instead of cat- I guess.

Your Monday Rule 5 puzzle

 Don't know who she is, but you've seen her before.

As usual, the big one below the fold- 

So this is the "new" plandemic they're trying to get going?

 SRSLY?

I was wondering about this Monkeypox plague we're supposed to worry about and I finally went looking, and found it on probably one of the more biased .GOV sites you could find....

"Monkeypox is a rare, viral infection that does not usually cause serious illness. However, it can result in hospitalization or death. That's why health officials in New York, the U.S., and around the world are monitoring cases of monkeypox in areas that do not usually report monkeypox infections, including in New York State.

While New Yorkers should not be alarmed, everyone should stay informed about monkeypox. This means understanding the symptoms, how it spreads, and what to do if you are exposed."

So THIS is the new way to pie the 2022 election?😕

How contagious IS it?

"Monkeypox spreads through close, physical contact between people. This means anyone can get monkeypox. However, based on the current outbreak, certain populations are being affected by monkeypox more than others, including men who have sex with men (MSM).

Based on previous outbreaks of monkeypox around the world, some groups may also be at heightened risk for severe outcomes if they contract monkeypox. This includes people with weakened immune systems, elderly New Yorkers, young children under 8 years of age, and pregnant people."

You mean like the tens of THOUSANDS of expensive old people that Cuomo sentenced to death with his order to place infected COVID patients in nursing homes???

A homemade sodastream

I did this home made carbonator and it works. 

10lb CO2 tank from marketplace CO2 regulator from Ebay

 The Kegorator ball lock and caps from an online brew supply shop

All together it probably cost less than $75

 Get extra caps to keep them pressured up.

 The colder the liquid, the better 

 A refill for that 10 lb tank that'll probably last almost a year is about $20 at a welding shop.
I added a ball valve by the bottle, just because- you can pick it and two hose barbs (1/4") plus braided line for the pressure hose and two hose clamps at a DYI store.

Better than sliced bread?

 SRSLY?

Just how lazy are you?
AND you're paying more than double for even less.

Your Rule 5 puzzle for this Monday

 I thought she was a differnt Bunny.

But she works anyway....

.

The big one below the break.

Your Monday Rule 5 puzzle

 Is this kink, or the newest design in MOPP gear (or whatever they're calling it now)?

And the big one below the break-

'Murica!

 The mud room

 

Find the "weapon of war" 🙄

Maybe I should have hidden it better because I expect all right answers....

Your Independence Day Rule 5 puzzle

 

As usual, the big one below the fold- 

This aged well

 Didn't it?

Now do this year Brandon's DepAg.....

Your Rule 5 Monday puzzle

 Fly
Fight
Win

The big one below the fold

Our opera singer is getting down with Zeppelin's "Kashmir"

She's REALLY getting into it.

Proving that we don't need a Ministry of Truth

 Or whatever the Democrats want to call it.

Because we have MSN and the alphabet "news" networks deleting stories that they don't like themselves.

Just like Glowball Climate changers are deleting historical weather reports....
MSN deleted a story that shows unvaxxed have less severe reactions to the 'Rona than fully vaxxed.

Color me shocked.

Your Monday Rule 5 puzzle

 Yes, I did that!

.

Big one below the fold.

Happy Juneteenth

 To all of you who were never slaves......

From us who never owned any.

Our opera singer and voice coach reacts to "Tom Sawyer" by Rush

I like watching her reactions.

Your Monday Rule 5 puzzle

 It looks like she stopped by Diogene's Middle Finger to get her Jill Biden makeup on...

The big one below the fold- 

Three hundred and twenty one Dollars

 For less than half a tank of propane.

Go fuck yourself Biden!

Something new about Locomotive Breath

A voice coach (and opera singer) reacts to Jethro Tull's Locomotive Breath.

TDLR- she likes it.

Hot in Texas

 It was so hot in Eagle Pass that it broke the truck thermometer.

It was the first time I got to make deliveries out west since 0biden lied about supporting the Constitution...
Things I noticed.

The Border Patrol is no longer doing tire drags to keep a vegetation free area along fence lines.
I guess when 0biden or Mayorkas is going to tell you to let them go, why waste gas pulling a tractor tire along fence lines.

The BP checkpoint is basically waving people through- because why bother asking questions if it doesn't matter.

The only diesel prices I saw over $5/gal was at Pilot. Everything else was $4.99 -$4.45 -almost equal to gasoline.

Doo, Doo, Doo

 Looking out my back door...

Actually it was my kitchen window.
I could have probably hit her with a pistol if I was a poacher.

This place is turning into a regular Noah's ark.
This was about two hours after the deer video,

There were about 10-15 of them working their way up towards the water trough before the neighbor girls scared them off when they started to work their horses.

I was just heading in to get a rifle, too.

Your Monday Rule 5 puzzle

 

The big one below the fold-

It was the dark of the moon

On the sixth of June-

 In a Kenworth pulling logs.

 Cab-over Pete with a reefer on and a Jimmy hauling hogs...............

It was the 3rd of June

 Another sleepy, dusty Delta day....

What was I doing?
What was my brother doing?